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Saturday, October 24, 2009

Shame for Sunday Scribblings

Sunday Scribblings prompt #186 -- Shame - I read once that there's only one emotion that is just as powerful in recollection as it is on the spot. You know, when you remember an instance of being happy or sad, you don't re-experience the full happiness or sadness you were feeling then, but when you remember feeling shame, you have a physical reaction and it's just as powerful as when it was fresh. Crazy. So, write something about shame.

Three Score and Ten

raucous ravens cluster
at a door stained by crosses

when nights turn long and
love goes absent

shame wraps her in a coffin
keeps her there 'til dawn

rude and rowdy ravens
growl guilt at light of day

where ravens crowd the gutter
to pluck succor from her heart

Fractal created in Apophysis.


Heliotropism said...

Ooh, I really like this!! I like how you convey how shame can remove pieces of us slowly over time until we are no more.

Anonymous said...

Very well written...interesting !

Jeeves said...

lovely one. these lines are brilliant

when nights turn long and
love goes absent

Gordon Mason said...

Like how you use the symbolism of the ravens to impress the shame; and how the "r" sound goes through the poem in so many words.

George S Batty said...

Nice work..but you always write well. this poem is special for me. takes my heart to sweet memories. maybe it wasn't meant to be that way but good poetry takes different people to different places

Patois42 said...

I feel pecked at mercilessly. Nicely done.

JP/deb said...

Wonderful metaphor and imagery here! Bravo :)


Dee Martin said...

Loved the third stanza. Shame being a form of death? Interesting picture.

b said...

I love it when make us each bring out own meaning to the poem. What did she do that would have "ravens growl guilt at the light of day"? Beautiful.


ChefDruck said...

I love the alliterations every time you mention the ravens. It sounds just like their caws.

Gel said...

Vivid metaphor
I can imagine those "rude and rowdy ravens" "growling"- your images for shame are powerful. Excellent poem!

Americanising Desi said...

absolutely ALIVE!

Shame on me