white fingered clouds
scratch the bruised sky
naked trees stretch
their outreached limbs
fog spools anonymity
cloaks the stars in
November bare and
night time chill
by the dark of moon
across two empty tracks
she dreams of flames
and waits for love.
Fractal created in Fractal Explorer
Writers Island prompt: The Dream
fractals
Posts
23 comments:
Nicely done. By far my favorite of what of yours I've read. What would you think of cutting the word," outreached?" If the trees are stretching, then their limbs are reaching out, so cutting the word would give you a bit more compression in the finished poem. PS: If you don't want this kind of comment, let me know, and I'll refrain. I also like the way the word "anonymity" works in the 4th and 5th lines both. I can never figure out how to do that. Thanks.
I love the black and white of this poem that bursts into color at the very end... beautiful and haunting...
Nicely done! And the fractal photo/rendering was beautiful in B&W. Very good.
Love this poem. Like Richard, definitely one of my favorite of all the ones that you have written.
My favorite line is the : white fingered clouds scratch the bruised sky
I love this too......you're firing on all cylinders at the moment. The second and third stanzas just blew me away!
Love the poem!!!
Love the poem!!!
The last two lines work together beautifully.
But my favoite line in this piece is:
scratch the bruised sky
very vivid imagery!
I think I like this poem best, too, of those I've read. Nice work.
I see someone looking at an evening sky in late autumn. There's an atmosphere of mystery.
Beautiful...
You never cease to amaze me! You seem to say so much with so few words,. Absolutely delightful.
wonderful imagery....loved it.
Whoa, that's a strong poem. Really lovely.
Thanks for stopping by earlier! I hope you'll return!
This is beautifully written - the imagery - bruised sky, cloaks of stars, dark moon - very nice.
Sue,
I love this poem, especially the start ... "white fingered clouds" ... mmm, that was brilliant!!
xx,
JP/deb
memories of laying on ones back and staring at the dreamy clouds... thanks for that. :-)
I love looking at clouds trying to decipher what my future holds..
Very beautiful imagery..
Loved the crescendo of this poem, I was left with such feeling of hope in the dankness of winters approach!
Love can be that warming ... very nice!
"she dreams of flames
and waits for love." I am blown away, you touch deep into my heart with your words, all the time. Thank you.
Sue, you never cease to amaze. "she dreams of flames
and waits for love" Wow...powerful imagery!!
You have a lovely way with words!
And the Fractal - Wow!
Post a Comment