with sapient new wariness
a tincture of iodine
he applied to the bloody bite
halving a full scale glitch
like the wondrous cover
of a very mean book
her patterned caparison
hid proof of the wild beast
he doffed his hat to that maid
who made fondling so futile ~
capitulated, crumpled his kerchief
then southward he fled
Fractal image.
♥ ♥ ♥
20 comments:
good use of the words...the first two lines sound great, and I also like "wondrous cover of a very mean book"
There is such a sense of adventure and mystery in this poem, I really enjoyed reading it :)
I agree with Ana, that line is great.
Interesting use of the words.
I agree with Ana, that line is great.
Interesting use of the words.
excellent use of the words. hope you're having a great start to your weekend.
'her patterned caparison
hid proof of the wild beast'
are my favourite lines... while I find the language a bit awkward, which is natural with using random words meaningfully in a poem, like making a poem out of a crossword puzzle... this image of the beast lying beneath her skin, a 'patterned caparison' give a sense of the maid he fled from in evocative ways
she sounds like a wolf perhaps
or was she wearing leopard skin?
yes, with a 'bloody bite' dowsed in 'iodine tincture' (I can smell it), further 'fondling' would be 'futile' and best 'southward' flee...
off itinerant knight, off!
lovely!
The first of many conquests...? And not even a 'How was it for you?'...
I enjoyed reading your poem. I thouht the ending was especially good!
Susan love what you did with the words.
Pamela
Well done! I love how you've used the words in this very concise poem!
found you through "thoughts, writing, coffee..." love this poem. Catchy alliteration. I especially like the first stanza, "a tincture of iodine he applied to the bloody bite" has great imagery and rhythm!
xxx- jess
http://mymomentsmuse.blogspot.com/
I could feel the urgency. Very nice.
"like the wondrous cover/of a very mean book"
is definitely a great line, but then so is
"that maid/who made fondling so futile" !!
Like the blaggard who headed south
in the last stanza
I like the second stanza too.
"like the wondrous cover
of a very mean book"
was a fantastic addition. Wove the disparate parts together!
I love seeing how poets have wrangled with this wordle. Love your short shrift to this mighty challenge. Like Deb, my favorite lines are "like the wondrous cover/of a very mean book." Yum!
http://lindagoin.com/
what a mysterious character! wonder where he's off to next!
Loved the middle stanza (just like all the others), and the line "that maid who made fondling so futile". Two compelling characters, and a very cool fractal.
This is so different to the poems I have read recently. It's full of mischief and mystery. I really like it. I was excited when reading it!
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