Tumblewords

Fractals Photos Poetry Prose Watercolor

Thursday, July 29, 2010

24 Jack for BigTent

BigTent Poetry offers this prompt:  Poem an icon into a situation they may never, in real life, appear.



24 Jack

shaken and stirred
a step ahead of noon
cracked a carton of eggs
for quiche a man could eat

stabbed a slab of cheese
pushed it through a grater
bruised cilantro and dill
and squeezed a leak of lime

skinned two sausage fingers
pinched bloody-red bitters
pummeled the final potion
into a flattened crust of pie

catching his breath by whispers
he slammed the oven shut and
straddled his backward chair
to count the timer down

  A fractal image.

♥     ♥     ♥

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Cooking as a contact sport! Jack comes through with action-packed verbs and a structure to emphasize them. There's something about this poem that makes me see color and hear jazz. It feels like I've had a vacation just watching Jack twice now.

Stan Ski said...

Jack's the lad...!
It DOES sound tasty.
Cilantro... ? Is that Coriander...?

vivienne blake said...

excellent cookery lesson! Perfect description in a minimum of words. Bravo. Can you explain to this maths dyslexic why it is a fractal?

Third attempt at posting this - I keep getting this problem with your and others' blogs. Is it something I said?

Linda said...

I can see it all—the entire act of creation. The last three lines work so well with everything that went before—again I see him clearly counting the timer down.

mark said...

Some marvelous turns of phrase and words here. So much to savor and now I am hungry to boot!

Rachel said...

Ha! "skinned two sausage fingers"--gruesome and hilarious.

Mary said...

Hmmm, if he is a television character, no I do not know him. Good characterization despite my lack of knowledge.

Linda Bob Grifins Korbetis Hall said...

great one!

Elizabeth said...

I like you descriptive detail and focus on a homely chore that also made me very hungry for some reason.

Elizabeth

flaubert said...

Susan I love where this prompt took you!
Pamela

Cynthia Short said...

Jack Bauer as a hungover chef...what an imagination!

barbara said...

Great idea. The ending is perfect, too. Both the idea of counting down and the impatient patience. (I always have trouble putting into words that way of turning a chair. I like this one)

mareymercy said...

Love the joyous violence of this. Fantastic!

Sam Liu said...

Wonderful poem, you've really made me hungry :D

rallentanda said...

So, evidently real men do eat quiche over there. Clever and funny. Well done BB

Naquillity said...

makes me want some eggs, :) great poem. have a wonderful weekend.

Ben Curran said...

As the poem ends, I can hear the familiar beeping of the 24 clock counting down...I love this poem. Awesome response to what I thought was a challenging prompt.

brenda w said...

This is friggin' awesome! Ha! I love the cadence, it trips off the tongue and is so darn fun. well done!

Weasel said...

A fun read! I've not eaten all day, so this poem made me hungry beyond hungry. Great post!

-Weasel

chiccoreal said...

Dear Tumblewords: Love this Love in the kitchen!On the table of Love! There sure is something cooking in the kitchen with Tumblewords; is Jack only 24 or is it #24 Jack or is it the Street where the fine Restaurant resides? Either way, this sounds so fresh like a fine gastronomic feast with Jack as an imperative imperitif!Succulent!