Tumblewords

Fractals Photos Poetry Prose Watercolor

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Key of Sea



wild ginger lay low
in the space between shadows

wind whistled along
half a note from the shore

white herons danced
while sand hugged the water

two ends of a summer
the middle gone missing

forever lost in the song
bobbing east of all places




Watercolor, East of all Places
Prompt from Writers Island

31 comments:

Rambler said...

two ends of a summer
the middle gone missing

wow great use of words..

Lea said...

Beautiful. Your use of word and image have me feeling that place when summer is gone... and only that "half a note from the shore" carries the memory...

desert rat said...

I like how the two-line stanzas and the rhythm contained within are like waves lapping the shore. Nicely done. I thought of "quay" when I was riffing on the prompt earlier, it's neat to see another sea connection; and tying it in with music really works too. (Funny, I've got a musical connection of sorts in my story as well!)

Rebicmel said...

I loved this very much. Poetry is my given choice of writing. I didn't post to my poetry blog in regard to the key but if you would ever like to read some of my poetry you can here at
www.rebicmel-poeticponderings.blogspot.com


I would welcome comments and critiques.

Jo said...

wild ginger lay low
in the space between shadows

wind whistled along
half a note from the shore

Oh I see this so clearly. It's just lovely....

Rae Trigg said...

What a beautiful portrait of a shoreline! I really enjoyed your poem.

Karina said...

This had such a nice flow to it. Great imagery too, I could see it as I read it.

Brian said...

I find it interesting how magical your words are to transport me back to a place long ago.

Mary Timme said...

Of all places...neat! I liked this a lot. Liked the painting too.

Steve said...

I like the way one can get lost in the essence of your writing.

Becca said...

I love the phrase "east of all places" ~and the painting that depicts it. It seems like a magical place, where wonderful things would happen.

Lovely poem:)

Tracy said...

Beautiful poem and very soothing to read. :)

paris parfait said...

Lovely imagery in your poem - really beautiful and the painting is the perfect accompaniment!

Marja said...

Wow magic words. I love Whistled..half a note from the shore. And than the beautiful painting. Thanks

odessa said...

"white herons danced
while sand hugged the water" - wonderful imagery!
great painting too. i love the colors.

keith hillman said...

I loved the way your words ebbed and flowed! Wonderful use of the prompt.

AnnieElf said...

I have read this over and over. I am fascinated by what you are trying to say. What I really GET is the clear knowledge that where the sea is concerned, there is no control, no beginning, no end. Even the sea shore is constantly shifting and surpising us, much like a musical poem.

Ashley Lyn said...

Wow, you've done an amazing job of perfectly capturing a moment with this piece. From the first line I feel drawn into your mental landscape. Lovely. Thank you.

Pauline said...

every word is just right!

Awareness said...

Where DID that middle go? I enjoyed the visuals of your poem..... I love to write about the shoreline and ocean or about the river which I can see from my livingroom....such mystery and intrigue under the water.

thank you for your lovely comments on my blog. I'm touched by them.

Marie said...

wind whistled along
half a note from the shore - this was my favorite snippet as well....

I can hear the melody now...thanks for visiting me today fellow Idahoan. I always enjoy coming to visit you both for your magical poetry and your beautiful artwork. You are inspiring!

pepektheassassin said...

Good work! *btw, have you read Sand County Almanac?

Love your artwork, your amazing creativity.

kimberley said...

Vivid, beautiful images. The poem feels like falling through bolts of silk.

Lucy R. E. said...

others have used words like "magical," "lovely," "vivid"...and they're all right. just reading this poem makes me feel warmer and a bit more relaxed. i wish i could be "bobbing east of all places."

Clare said...

Hi Sue! I second what Lucy R.E. said above. I love every word, from the first word of the title (and its play on the key of c) to the last word of the poem. And I love the musical theme -- and the movement and flow -- and all the w's in the first half -- and your utterly spectacular watercolor that shimmers in glorious light.

gautami tripathy said...

This seems very musical. I liked each word.

Steve said...

Coming from you, your comments mean so much. Thank you.

Fenny said...

Wow ... what a great poem ... every line strong and beautiful ... I'm so envious right now ;)

Ingrid said...

I loved this. It felt like a breeze in late summer.

giggles said...

Just a lovely thread of words! Colors in the art are simply entrancing!

Hugs Sherrie

Jo(sie) said...

Loved it! Beautifully done,

Jo(sie)